Trump and Cereal Boxes
Let’s try to make some speculations of Trump’s beliefs on the magic of cereal purchases.
First of all, since the Donald became a TV star, I am sure that he did not have one of his many limousines stop at a market to let him out in his Tux to go buy a box of cereal. Since smart phone cameras are ubiquitous, he would have been recognized, and there would be a well-known photo of or selfie with him with his cereal boxes (he always deserves two portions of anything sweet).
On the other hand, if he did this, the check-out clerk would have asked him for a picture ID, just to make sure it was the @realDonaldTrump, and not just a look-alike or a professional Trump imitator, in order to tell a story about this. That would explain why Trump thinks you need an ID to shop for groceries. Or, it could be that he had to show an ID when he tried to pay with a $500 dollar bill, or his casino poker chips.
While we know of the common voter-appealing foods that Trump supposedly eats, like burgers and fried chicken and taco salads on Mexican holidays, (not to mention two scoops of ice cream and rich chocolate cake), we know nothing about his breakfasts. (Non Disclosure Agreements).
I suspect he eats the same kiddie cereal that I do, which I am not allowed to mention on a University blog, lest it seems like an endorsement. But Donald, the lucky charms are not real charms, as your high disapproval ratings show. They are just fake marshmallows. And, the Captain America cards inside do not shield you from FBI or IRS investigations. Also, the Spider-Man cards cannot be used to give you a controlling web of all American businesses and industries, like the NFL, the NBA, Harley Davidson, CNN, the Washington Post, etc., etc.
What started this blog is Trump’s claim that if you buy a box of cereal, you can vote. I haven’t read the back of a cereal box since I was a kid, so I didn’t know that the card inserts could be used for voting. I just toss them out. Otherwise, since the Presidential election of 2016, I could have collected about 200 of them, and voted 200 times in the midterm.
Fortunately, I have a collection of different hats from beach resorts that I have vacationed at. And, I have a lot of shirts. So it will be relatively easy for me to turn around after voting, go back to my car, change hat and shirt, and vote again. Thanks for the plan, Donald. Does that make you a co-conspirator? The problem in all of these schemes, is that you have to know the names and addresses of a whole lot of people who never show up to vote. The point of these right-wing claims is to scour non-voters from the voting rolls. Then, when they finally get angry enough to vote, they can’t.
This car-disguise scheme doesn’t actually work for Democratic voters in Republican counties or states. They are usually in packed, urban, gerrymandered districts, and have to stand in line for an hour or two to vote. As we see in Florida, their voting machines are also old, and will break down. Also, the urban voters can’t park anywhere near the voting booths. So the accusation is just another Trump nothing-burger. Which brings us back to Trump’s real foods.
