Author: Glenda Orozco

This is going insanely faster than the first quarter. This quarter I decided to enroll myself in the standard 12 units since my last experience got me close to burnout. I have seen significant improvements in academic performance and mental health, but I honestly miss the pressure, playfulness, and vibrance that G.E. classes can add to my schedule. My priority this quarter is chemistry– it involves several hours and countless practice problems–, and research opportunities to gain technical skills for a scientific career. Here are some highlights of my past weeks at UCI.
First, here are some of my research findings. I found a couple more clubs that align with my interests. They all can help me develop skills through volunteering but more importantly, can help me network with organizations that could result in an internship or even a future job. My struggle now is deciding which ones to join. A UCI medical school student advised me: “Commitment. It is quality over quantity. Show responsibility”. I believe it is a good strategy. I have also thought that in that way it will be easier for me to get a leadership position within the club or organization I end up joining.

Continuously, changes are inevitable. I went from a triple dorm to a double. One of my roommates moved out. I did not think it was possible to move amid the year, but it turns out it is (just tell your RA and they will send you a form). She told me about her plans beforehand and I was mourning her absence until we both noticed she had been moved –literally– to the dorm next door. It might sound contradictory but our friendship has been strengthened by these changes. After our rushed days, we sit at a not-so-comfortable wood bench on our floor, and unknot all the tension and concerns that the discrepancies of life arise. The moral of the story is don’t resist changes, instead appreciate the new experiences they come with.

Finally, my personal life matters as much as chemistry class. When I set up my schedule and do my to-do list I would only do it for my classes. I noticed that I have been ignoring my personal projects and regarding them as optional. My family has helped me notice this and now my calendar has deadlines for both personal goals and academic goals. My identity was being reduced to school and I must correct that. I am keeping up my language learning journey and will make sure to continue writing my poems, reading, and preparing myself for more top-secret projects I have– I might need to take some business class next quarter-.

Dear Reader, thank you.

Write to you soon,

Glenda Orozco

9 am., Brandywine. First week after winter break, empty seats all around me. My phone and earbuds set aside to narrow my attention to my meal. A sip of cold water is not enough to wake me up fully. Eat. An interruption, a stranger, a couple of minutes later, I have made a new friend. Yesterday, he shared a quote on his social media that reads: “Your old self can no longer sustain the life you are trying to lead” (Brianna Wiest). Agree. 

Frustration tainted my first quarter experience. I felt physically and emotionally drained. Today, I can tell that the discrepancy between my goals, expectations, and habits caused it. I expected to take rigorous classes, forge relationships with Professors, volunteer, join recreational clubs, make new friendships, and sustain a connection with family; I set broad goals: Get A’s, set time for myself, build up my resume; and my habits…they had served me well for all these years…Why change them? While it is true that they helped me achieve growth and accomplishments, they are no longer suitable for the new circumstances I am in or the circumstances I plan to be in. Doing homework and extra-practice problems until late at night is not worth it when you can’t wake up the next day or when being awake takes up all the energy you have. Being exhausted is not synonymous with productivity. Additionally, sleep deprivation affects mood. Who wants to be friends with someone who is cranky, and rushing to meetings all the time? Multiple meetings of clubs that don’t match my values and passions.Would I feel proud of adding them to my resume? 

I have experience now. Based on last quarter, I learned that less is more–some called it quality over quantity–. Taking more units, and taking that extra class that looks interesting has a great cost. Science classes require a great amount of dedication, this is practice and patience. I will not take extra classes anymore and will go to office hours as many times as needed. This will allow me to enjoy my classes, connect to Professors, and perform better–especially in exams–.  No more “working till exhaustion”.  Productivity, again, can be measured by “quality over quantity”. Comparing myself to others or following advice will not take me far. Allow yourself to live your own journey. Sacrifices will pay off. Maybe not going home on the weekend can lead me to explore the city, do volunteering, and be around potential friends. I know now. 

My habits are not sustainable anymore. I have been setting small, measurable, time-bound goals to achieve throughout my four years; setting up a new routine, focusing on what brings me joy, taking fewer classes, finding the balance between discipline and flexibility, allowing myself to make changes and accepting the sacrifices needed to be healthy. I am ready to jump into adventures and opportunities I couldn’t with a full schedule and little sleep. I’m awake and re-energized.

Dear Glenda, 

Once more, you are going to realize that you never know enough. Ten weeks ago, you became a college student. It is the moment you ferociously worked for your entire life. Has it been what you expected? No, It has been even more meaningful yet challenging than you visualized it. Academically speaking, the habits you forged throughout the years are still effective. Keep doing spaced studying and encouraging yourself to feel uncomfortable. Periodically refreshing the content you learned through application questions is a scientifically backed-up study strategy. The feeling of frustration or discomfort you get while solving problems is a signal that you are strengthening connections between neurons, the more you recall that memory, the more accessible it becomes, that is how learning feels and looks like. 

Nevertheless, you are going to be challenged. Some core beliefs you have sustained are going to be dismantled. In your Social Problems class – a random elective class you chose–you will dissect a study that contrasts the academic behaviors of low-income students compared to middle-class students. If I ask you how does a successful student behave? You will have in mind someone independent, polite, and responsible–it sounds like you indeed– but in the study, the middle-class students who use so-called strategies of influence (treat teachers as resources, try to avoid consequences of their actions, ask for help), are more academically successful. Furthermore, those who display deference strategies–working-class students– tend to be first-generation college dropouts. Shocking, right? You are going to change your ways dramatically. You are going to have to bomb Professors with questions and urgently demand help and attention every time you are stuck; forget about “being a bother” or wasting valuable time trying to figure it out yourself, you have to become the opposite of what you have been taught your whole life. 

Finally, don’t get desperate about making friends. Changing how you behave academically will also lead you to revamp your social life. You will take the lead to make strangers become intimate friends…and will fail. You will notice that the people you want to be friends with do not align with what you need at the time. Drop your idealizations, respect your priorities, and keep your boundaries in mind–you will find the friends you need. At the same time, I am impressed and proud of how you have worked to reconnect to yourself; keep on giving compliments, turning banal conversations into therapy sessions, prompting doors, reminding people how valuable they are, and doing whatever you find satisfaction in. 

Best wishes, 

Yourself (one day away from finals week).